Cheap Therapy

It occurred to me after the holidays we have have lost what generations before us would recognize as therapy that is both convenient and cheap. I spent a good part of several days in a row ironing all the holiday napkins and table cloths I had used for our special family dinners on Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Christmas Day. I own a lot of cloth napkins. I own no paper napkins (except for those really cute cocktail kind that make you want to have a party). Cloth napkins make even pizza in a box seem like a served meal.

My oldest daughter, Shannah, happened to call me two days in a row while I was ironing and sounded partly amused and partly disbelieving. I felt old. While my generation discovered and dabbled in permanent press, her generation went way beyond permanent press into permanent wear; as in wear it til it walks into the hamper on its own, then pull it out and wear it again... several more times. I honestly witnessed a survey being taken by 30-somethings that actually asked how many days' wear before washing was acceptable for a favorite pair of jeans. The answers astounded me. Of course, these are the kids that started the whole college phenomenon of 'throw your hair in a pony and wear your pajamas to your 8 o'clock class so you can sleep an extra half hour, then go back to your dorm and shower', after everyone on campus has already seen you looking so lovely. I have no category for that in my brain.

You can imagine my daughter's response when she called the third day and happen to catch me once again ironing.

"What are you doing?"

"I'm still working on these Christmas linens."

"Of course you are. Really?! wow."

I tried to explain I hadn't actually been ironing for 36 hours straight, but that she just happen to catch me when I was ironing.

"Yes, but you're doing it. You're ironing napkins. That's a crack up. All I have is 'wow'."

I felt very old. But I liked it. I was breathing. I was calm. I was standing in the same place for longer than three seconds. I was thinking. I was reliving all the hilarious moments around the table and taking in all the togetherness that's never enough. I was praying for hearts that showed glimpses of concern at certain topics mentioned, and I was holding tightly to images of my grandkids faces who will grow up too fast, just like my girls did.

And then I realized. Modern technology is great, but it's robbing us of some valuable quiet, thinking time that people now pay a lot of money to get back. All these activities that soon may become a thing of the past were therapeutic. Ironing, washing dishes by hand, mowing the lawn (walking-style without headphones), hand-writing letters and journal entries, sewing and mending, working in the garden to grow your own food, and a hundred other tasks that have been replaced by machinery to save time.

Saving time mostly means extra minutes to cram in more things to do, which means more anxiety and stress and problems, which means we need more quiet time to figure out and fix. And that means therapists' offices are full of clients looking to do just that, when all they really need to do is buy cloth napkins.