"I Think She's Delightful, Really."
I stopped in to my daughter's gift and stationery shoppe the other day to buy a couple birthday presents. As usual, when I arrived she was on the phone with a customer, and I could tell by her face the person on the other end was neither one of her favorites, nor in any hurry to end the conversation.
"Who was that?" I quizzed.
"This lady who gets on my nerves for some reason. She's a good customer and I try to be nice to her, but I always feel like she thinks she's in charge of me." We both laughed, having had several conversations about authority issues. "She's coming in today to pick up an order she asked for tomorrow, but thankfully, it's ready, so it's ok."
It took me a while to pick out the gifts I wanted, and while I was standing near the counter a small, black-haired woman came in and used my daughter's first name when she asked for her order. They both chatted like old friends while I brought my purchases to the counter.
The woman appeared a tad disheveled, yet there was a certain sense of propriety about her, as well. It was only an observation, since I was in work-out clothes, with no sense of propriety about me whatsoever.
She turned to me and began to share all manner of compliments about my daughter, her helpfulness and knowledge, and the shoppe in general. Her remarks seemed genuine, and naturally, I felt a sense of pride. After talking a few minutes I felt it appropriate to tell her this was my daughter, which led to more complimenting, which led to how many children did I have?... All girls?... Is she the oldest?... What do her sisters do?... And are they creative as well, etc, etc.
Not wanting the conversation to be one-sided, I asked her a few obvious questions which led to a cordial, brief bonding. Do you live around here?...Where is your lovely accent from?...Oh, really! One of our daughters spent several months there and loved it, etc, etc.
Before I knew it, my purchases were beautifully wrapped, and I kissed and thanked my little shoppe owner and bid the woman goodbye. A few miles down the road my phone rang and my daughter began the conversation with, "That was her! That was the woman I was on the phone with!"
"You're kidding. I would have never guessed. I thought she was delightful, really."
"Well, yeah, I guess she was, but it was different this time. And get this... after you left she proceeded to offer me her vacation place for a week whenever she's not using it. She also invited me and the kids to her granddaughter's bat mitzva. I doubt I'll take her up on any of it, but it turned out to be a good conversation about different religious traditions. I bet she stayed talking to me for a good 15 minutes!"
After a few days had gone by, I still found myself thinking about the encounter and I wondered if my daughter ever thought about seeing challenging customers as opportunities for ministry. Not in the evangelistic sense, but whether it would make any difference when customers rubbed her the wrong way. Could she find anything in them that was delightful, as our Heavenly Father does?
Admittedly, I'm not the one who has to deal with a random customer who becomes irate because she can't redeem an old gift certificate from the store next door that has been out of business over a year. Nor am I the one whose children's meals depend on happy, returning customers. Afterall, my closest experience to working retail was a four-day stint as a waitress, so believe me, there's no judgment here.
But I did think about a few women I've met throughout my own life who rubbed me the wrong way, too. Some that seemed pushy or too forward or fake or self-righteous. Did I see those encounters as opportunities for ministry? Would that have made a difference in my attitude? Could I possibly see something in them that was delightful? I was reminded once again to keep lessons I was still learning to myself. And I was humbly grateful that God somehow delights in me, when I know full well I am not always delightful. Moreover, I'm sure I will have more chances to practice finding the good in difficult people. A favorite saying of mine says it best:
"There is so much good in the worst of us, and so much bad in the best of us,
that it behoves any of us to talk about the rest of us."
That said, if you're ever in our area and need a gift or some great stationery, stop in any occasion, inc., and say hi to my daughter, the owner. I think she's delightful, really.
